WE WERE ON A BREAK!
by Glee Let Me Down
Summary: In which Kurt DOES NOT CHEAT on Blaine with Sam during a game of hide and seek. sexuallyfrustrated!Kurt. Eventual Hevans. 6.14. COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

"I think we need a break…"

He said it softly; angrily. He knew how hard the words would hit and he didn't want anything to cushion the impact.

Kurt looked like he was having trouble breathing. Blaine knew that the tears would start any minute. "Blaine, what are you talking about?" His voice was shaking, although he was trying to keep calm.

"Maybe I need to let you fly free!" Blaine hissed. "That's what you want, isn't it?"

"You know that's not what I meant!" Kurt snapped. His entire body had tensed up. He tried to tell himself that it was all just a bad dream. Blaine couldn't really be doing this, could he? He loved Kurt. He'd been looking for him forever…

Kurt knew that his boyfriend was being unreasonable to begin with. In a way, Blaine brought all this upon himself. They'd been fine before Blaine started the job at six flags. It was only after he got tied up with rehearsal that things started going sour. He started to assume that Kurt would base his schedule around his. Kurt had tried to be accommodating, but he hated to miss out on the group outings that the kids from Glee club always invited him to go to. He had never told Blaine he couldn't come, but Blaine often complained that he felt out of place with the New Directions, and was clearly offended that Kurt wouldn't blow them off so they could go somewhere alone.

Whenever they were in groups, Blaine would get jealous of all the other guys, making "subtle" comments like:

"That Sam kid seems to like you a whole lot,"

"Is Puck always that touchy-feely with his male friends?"

"Mike thinks everything you say is gold. It's like he's just watching you constantly, waiting for you to speak."

And Kurt would reply with.

"Yes. He does. As a friend…Don't worry Blaine; he's straight. Not that it would make a difference if he wasn't."

"Puck's just affectionate. But it's okay because he's straight. Not that it would make a difference if he wasn't."

"Mike loves a good one liner. But he's straight. Not that it would make a difference if he wasn't."

But Blaine kept his guard up. He'd been keeping his cool for the most part until just now, when Sam called Kurt to invite him to another party Puck had decided to throw at Rachel's. Kurt had initially declined the invitation to spend alone time with Blaine, and Blaine was grateful. But then, he heard Kurt start laughing as the two boys made cracks about "the old ball and chain". At that point, he lost it. The decision for Kurt to focus some attention on him, just for one night, should've been easy. It should've been something he was thrilled to do.

"You don't want to be with me, Kurt, admit it!" Blaine shouted. "This right here is a waste of time! You clearly don't want to actively be my boyfriend right now, so why shouldn't I revoke you of the title until you do?"

Kurt was speechless. He tried to swallow the lump in his throat but it wouldn't go down. He was searching his brain for something to say; wishing he knew how to manipulate Blaine; to make him stay. He couldn't think fast enough, and before he could do anything about it, Blaine was heading for the door. Kurt was too weak to follow him.

* * *

><p>There was a knock on the door.<p>

"Rachel…you've been in there a while…" Puck's voice came through. "Are you two getting it on in there?"

"Get lost, Puckerman!" She snapped. "This is _not_ the time."

She sat on her bed next to Kurt, who was in the fetal position sobbing into a pillow. She waited until Puck's footsteps faded down the hallway, and then turned back to her best friend. "Then what happened?"

Kurt took a deep breath to fuel himself through his next phrase. "Then he left," He shook. "He just walked out…I was paralyzed, basically. I didn't have anything left to say…and he was just…gone…"

"Have you tried calling him?" Rachel suggested gently.

Kurt sat up, wiping under his eyes with the back of his hand and shaking his head rapidly. "No. I don't want to talk to him," He said quickly; almost panicked. "It's not going to fix anything…"

"It sounds like you guys had a fight. Couples fight."

"Not me and Blaine."

"All it means is that you two are out of your honeymoon stage." Rachel told him reasonably. "He needs time to calm down. You both need time to calm down."

Rachel leaned forward and hugged him. "It's over Rachel," He told her darkly. "I am furious with him. He needed me to belong to him and…" Suddenly he sounded more content, like he was having a revelation mid-sentence. "…I'm just not down with that."

"I just want you to be happy, Kurt," Rachel told him. "I think for tonight you should just try to forget about it and have fun. Come back to this later with a clear mind."

Kurt nodded. She was right. Beside, his anger toward Blaine at the current would be best expressed by having fun despite the fact that Blaine was probably sitting at home crying, assuming that Kurt was doing the same.

Kurt wasn't going be the guy who couldn't get over his ex. He wasn't going to sit around contemplating how he could've kept Blaine around. He honestly believed that he hadn't done anything wrong. If Blaine thought differently, that really was his problem wasn't it.

"Just let me wash my face," Kurt said bravely. "And then let's party like its 1999…"

"Seriously…?" Rachel said cynically, cringing at his lame quote.

* * *

><p>Kurt was alone at the Berry's dining room table, loading his paper plate with thin-crust pizza when Sam approached.<p>

"No Blaine tonight?" He was clearly just making conversation, and Kurt had to remind himself once again that the reason people asked was not to rub it in his face that his boyfriend had dumped him. "I thought you wanted to hang with him."

"No. There's not going to be any Blaine anymore," Kurt said simply, avoiding looking directly at the boy. "There's not going to be any Blaine ever again."

"Oh." Sam replied densely. "Well…I'm sorry."

He was standing pretty close to Kurt and reached around him to grab a slice of mushroom and olive. Kurt remembered how Sam was at parties when they first met; how he wouldn't dare to touch junk food in fear that his body would punish him for it. After his family started having problems, Sam became more relaxed. Kurt realized that it was because he couldn't afford to have a specific diet anymore. He had to eat whatever he could get.

"What about Mercedes?" Kurt asked. He felt bad, because he hadn't talked to her in nearly a week. He just hadn't gotten around to calling her. Honestly, he was surprised she wasn't here tonight: everyone else was.

"There's not going to be a Mercedes anymore…" Sam sighed. "I mean, obviously she'll still be around, but me and her…we weren't really cut out for each other. She had some family things tonight. We're still friends; I mean, she'd be here if she wasn't busy."

It kind of hit Kurt hard that Mercedes and Sam had broken up and he'd had no idea. She used to tell him everything. Now, it seemed they had almost completely drifted apart. Kurt felt kind of awful, standing there next to Sam and the pizza table, realizing that he'd lost his best friend the same day he lost his first love.

"I'm sorry," He told Sam. "I really thought you two would work out."

"Did you seriously…?" Sam gave him a sort of charming half-smile.

Kurt raised his eyebrows skeptically in response. "You didn't…?"

Sam chuckled and shrugged. "I made this…what's the word…resolution…?"

Kurt nodded, that sounded like the right word.

"Yeah…" Sam continued. "I decided to try things before I rule them out."

"…And Mercedes has been…"

"Completely ruled out…" Sam finished the sentence.

The two of them laughed softly, though neither of them really knew what they were laughing about.

"Well, I'm glad you've gained some clarity there," Kurt told him.

"Is that what you've gained in regards to the hobbit?"

Kurt rolled his eyes, pretending to be offended by the insult, but secretly kind of happy that someone was insulting Blaine. It made him feel like the whole world was on his side. "Yes." Kurt sighed. "I guess you could say that…"

"Well then," Sam sighed. "I'm happy for you too."

"Good," Kurt smiled oddly at him.

"Good…"

* * *

><p>Kurt sprinted down the hall on his tiptoes, holding his breath. He had a couple drinks in him, but only enough to make him slightly giddy. He didn't think he was drunk yet. Suddenly he collided with something. He almost cried out in shock, but he reminded himself that making any noise would give him away. The person he'd bumped into grabbed his shoulders to steady him. Kurt blinked, trying to make out the face. He saw the blond hair and the plump lips and grinned.<p>

"Come on!" Sam hissed. "Come with me."

They had turned off every light in Rachel's house. It had been Finn's idea to play an epic came of hide-and-seek tag. Kurt loved games like this. He loved to outsmart his friends. Sam grabbed Kurt's hand and pulled him into the nearby master bedroom. They rushed past the bed and planted themselves in a closet, nestled amongst the racks of Rachel's Dads' clothes.

"Her parents are gunna know we were in here!" Kurt whispered to Sam.

"It's not like they memorized their closet, Kurt." Sam laughed.

"Shut up!" Kurt snapped quietly. "Someone's gunna hear us."

"You're right!" Sam froze. "Oh my god…Someone's coming!"

He wrapped his arms around Kurt and started dropping to the floor. Kurt laughed and went along with it. Once they were down, Sam crawled to the wall, burying himself behind a rack of shirts. Kurt followed suite, even though he didn't hear anyone coming.

"We might be here awhile," He whispered to Sam.

"Mhmmm," Sam hummed. Sitting close to him, Kurt realized that Sam reeked of alcohol. Sam didn't seem drunk though. He just seemed…happy. He was probably was a similar level buzzed as him, Kurt thought, which was good. It was always the best when he and his friends were in similar states of mind. Sam whispered, "How are we gunna keep ourselves entertained?"

Kurt stifled a laugh, his mind wandering in all the wrong directions.

"I really am sorry about Blaine, Kurt," Sam shifted uncomfortably on the floor of the closet. Kurt was leaning up against the back wall with his knees pulled up to his chest. He had almost forgotten about Blaine. Damn it, Sam.

"It's fine," He said tersely.

"If he liked it then he should've put a ring on it," Sam mumbled almost incoherently.

"…What…?"

Sam coughed a bit. "You know, you're single now…all the single ladies…"

"I'm not a lady, Sam…" Kurt was starting to laugh, because he began to get the sense that Sam was a lot farther gone than he'd initially thought.

"Oh. Yeah. You're a gentle…man."

Kurt kept laughing, and realized he couldn't stop. He felt himself sliding down the wall a bit, and began to wonder if he was drunker than he wanted to admit as well. He wasn't bluffing when he told Rachel he was going to party hard tonight.

"Are you sad, Kurt?" Sam asked simply. Kurt realized that he had gotten on all fours and was leaning closer to him. His boozy breath began to hit Kurt on the cheek.

"No," Kurt said, trying not to flinch. It was a strange feeling; being so close to Sam. He was suddenly kind of aroused, and felt like the right thing to do would be to scoot away. Sam was his friend. His straight friend…feeling like the ones he was having seemed wrong. Sam didn't realize how close he was. He was drunk. He wasn't thinking.

"Really…?" Sam kind of stumbled and fell into Kurt. Luckily, the way Kurt was sitting kept Sam's face from slamming into his crotch.

"Sam. I think we might be drunk," Kurt said, starting to laugh again. He honestly couldn't figure out why he was laughing.

Sam started to laugh too and rolled onto his back. Kurt put his legs down and let Sam lay in his lap. "What if I fell asleep in here?"

Kurt couldn't see Sam's face, but he pictured what it would be like if he could; if he could see Sam's sweet, tired face looking up at him. He thought that might be nice.

Before Kurt could answer his question, though, they heard a click, and light from the bedroom came through the crack under the closet door. Impulsively, Kurt slapped one hand over his own mouth and one over Sam's. Sam was chuckling nervously. They heard footsteps going into the master bathroom, and they heard Finn searching on the other side of the wall.

"Oh my god," Kurt hissed, his competitive edge taking over. "We have to get out of here."

The two of them clumsily emerged from the racks and exploded from the closet, tearing through the bedroom.

"Hey!" They heard Finn shout. "Who is that!"

Kurt gripped Sam's wrist as the stumbled through the hallway, jumping into the first open door that they found. High on adrenaline, Sam slammed the door and locked it. Kurt cackled uncontrollably.

"Subtle, Samuel," Sam was leaning against the door, breathing heavily. Kurt reached for the doorknob. "Unlock it. That's against the rules."

Sam swatted his hand out of the way. They could hear Finn bounding up the hallway. He tried the doorknob himself then started pounding on the door. "Whoever's in there…you're kind of cheating…"

Kurt rolled his eyes and stepped away from the door. His eyes began to adjust and he realized they were in one of the Berry's guest rooms now. He kind of wished the lights were on because Rachel's Dads' were great decorators, and he liked to see what they did with there spaces. As he squinted and looked around, Sam cam behind him and put a hand on his shoulder…he remembered why they were in here in the first place and turned around, grinning.

"Unlock it, Sam," He ordered.

Sam shook his head, his hands traveling to rest on Kurt's bicep. "Either way…" He breathed back. "We loose…"

"What…?" Kurt closed his eyes, suddenly dizzy. Sam was standing really close…he couldn't think properly when Sam stood this close. Sam's hands moved on his arms in little circles, sending chills throughout his body.

"Go away Finn," Sam shouted loudly. He was putting his arms around Kurt's waist now. Instinctively, Kurt reached up and held the blond boy's arms. Yes, his thoughts had completely left him now. He looked to the door.

"Sam..?" He heard a disbelieving smile in Finn's voice. "No way, man… Who do you have in there?"

"Go away Finn!" Sam snapped again. Then he turned back toward Kurt and whispered. "It's not cheating if we're not going to play anymore…"

And suddenly Sam had his palms on Kurt's ass and was shoving his tongue so far into Kurt's mouth that Kurt was surprised he wasn't gagging. Kurt welcomed Sam without hesitation. He moved one hand up to Sam's shoulder and used the other to grab a handful of long, soft hair. Almost immediately, Sam started tugging at Kurt's shirt, and Kurt allowed him to remove it. Sam pulled away and took off his own shirt, backing up to the bed.

Then, suddenly Kurt's conscience kicked in. "Oh my god! You're gay?" He almost yelled.

"Naw," Sam said quickly, reaching for Kurt's and pulling him down onto the bed. He said nothing else, but Kurt wasn't in any state to ask for explanations.

Sam grabbed Kurt's shoulders and pushed him down onto the mattress. He then straddled Kurt's hips and planted kiss after kiss across his smooth, bare chest. Kurt wasn't sure how to react. Things were getting pretty intense. Honestly, this was more intense than things had ever gotten with Blaine. Sam reached down and unbuttoned Kurt's jeans.

"God, you really don't waste any time," Kurt joked breathlessly.

Sam grinned, putting his hand around Kurt's erection. Kurt gasped, suddenly unable to form any more words. He lifted his hips slightly off the mattress so Sam could pull his pants further down his thighs.

"Honestly…" Sam told him, he sloppily kissed Kurt's chest again and then his ribs, his lips were gradually moving down Kurt's abdomen. "…This is just something I've always wanted to try."

Well, Kurt thought, he's certainly got the mouth for it.

* * *

><p><em>Blaine.<em>

That was the first thing Kurt thought as his eyes fluttered open the next morning. It had been the first thing he thought about every morning since months before they got together. This morning was no exception.

_Blaine. _

He inhaled sharply, his face pressed into a stack of pillows. Where was he? It took him a moment. Rachel's house… This was Rachel's house. But he didn't remember falling asleep.

_Sam. _

Oh god. He sat up quickly, and his eyes darted over to the blond boy lying beside him; the boy who had given him his first blow job several hours earlier. Then, Kurt remembered: Blaine dumped him. Sam had wanted him. And the aching all over his body, along with the dry mouth and nausea, reminded him that they had also been drinking.

He stood up and got dressed. Sam was still in his pants from the night before, but his shirt was off and his perfect torso was completely exposed. Kurt felt himself sneak a peak at him, and then was instantly embarrassed, even though there was nothing there to stop him. Sam was straight, right? He was really confused about that. Sam had just been drunk and curious. Kurt was sure there were a lot of straight guys who wondered what it was like to put a penis in their mouth…He himself wondered about boobs sometimes.

But dear god, Sam had been good. Not that Kurt had anything to compare it to.

"Sam," Kurt hissed. He went around the bed and gave the boy a light shake. He really hoped Sam would remember the night before. It would be awkward to explain to him. Or maybe if Sam didn't remember, he could convince him that he'd slept alone.

Sam stirred, rubbing his eyes as he sat up and looked at Kurt. It took him a minute to process everything, and by the way he held his head, wincing, Kurt could tell that Sam's hangover was a lot worse than his. But he remembered, Kurt was slightly relieved to realize. It showed on his face that he remembered. His eyes widened and his mouth gaped and he was at a loss for words, he blinked at Kurt, whose lips were pursed apologetically.

"Oh my god…" Sam said hoarsely. "…I hooked up with a dude last night."

"No one has to know," Kurt told him quickly. He wasn't sure if he wanted people to know. He felt like a total slut.

Sam stood up and got his shirt off the floor. "God, Kurt. I'm sorry that happened."

"It's fine," Kurt just wanted to be done talking about it. He knew it didn't mean anything. There was nothing to talk about. There wasn't even anything to think about. It had been fun, but it was in the past now: a one-time thing. "Let's just get out of here."

Sam nodded. They glanced awkwardly around the hallway to make sure no one was lingering before walking through it and going down the staircase into Rachel's kitchen.

"We were wondering what happened to you two," Puck and Rachel were sipping coffee at the kitchen table.

"Did you two finally bone!" Puck asked loudly, shocked to see the two of them together.

"Noah!" Rachel scolded, looking horrified.

"Definitely not…!" Sam shouted a little too defensively.

"It's fine," Kurt turned to Sam nervously. "Puck thought me and Rachel were having sex last night."

"We were hiding and we fell asleep," Sam said, in a tone that Kurt still felt was unconvincing. But maybe he was just paranoid…

"That's interesting…" Rachel said suspiciously. She locked eyes with Kurt, and he felt his cheeks flame up. A wicked look came into Rachel's eyes. Oh god, she knew.

"Yeah, well. I'm leaving." Kurt said quickly. He started out of the kitchen.

"I'll walk you to the door!" Rachel jumped out of her seat to follow him. Kurt should've known he wouldn't be able to escape her.

"Shut up…" He said immediately as the two of them entered the hallway.

"Kurt Hummel…what did you do?" She sounded excited. She was thrilled by the potential of scandal.

"Shut up…" Kurt said again, approaching the front door.

"Kurt, what about Blaine?" She jumped between him and the door, demanding answers.

Kurt had what he thought was an obvious answer to that. "Blaine broke up with me."

"Kurt…" Rachel shook her head at him. She looked scared, almost.

"Well, it's too late to change anything now," He reminded her simply. "You're the one who told me to forget about him, so that's what I did."

"I told you to clear your mind!" She hissed. "I didn't tell you to…"

He interrupted. He didn't want to hear him say it. "I was going to move on eventually!"

"I don't think you really know that!" She snapped. "I mean…it was just a fight."

"No, Rachel. He broke up with me." Kurt hated to say those words over and over again. The more he said them, the more they rang as truth, and the deeper they cut. He couldn't believe that it was real. He was almost thankful for what happened with Sam. At least he had that feeling; knowing that someone had wanted him, however briefly; to fall back on. That _was_ supposed to make him feel better, wasn't it? "I have to go…"

"Well…if you need to talk," Rachel stepped away from the door to let him out.

"There's nothing to talk about…"

He walked into his kitchen ten minutes later, wearing his clothes from the night before, his eyes red and his hair messed up. Burt and Carol were sitting at the table, Carol eating a croissant and reading the Arts and Leisure section while Burt sipped his coffee and did the crossword puzzle. They looked up at Kurt in unison. He refused to make eye contact with either of them.

"I don't want to talk about it." He mumbled. Burt choked a bit, but respected his son's wishes.

Kurt got upstairs and found Finn brushing his teeth in their shared bathroom. As Kurt came down the hall, he stuck his head out and chuckled.

"If you came in looking like that, then they definitely realize we slept at the same party…" He said. Kurt gave him the finger. He didn't know why. It just sort of happened, and then he retreated into his room and slammed the door.


	2. Chapter 2

After he'd spent about an hour in the shower, making sure to get every last trace of Sam Evans off of him (although he still felt tainted as he dried himself off), he put on a pair of sweatpants (an item no-one outside of the Hummel-Hudson family would ever know he owned) and crawled into bed with his laptop and his _I Love Lucy_ DVDs. His mom had loved _I Love Lucy_, and when he was really little it was a treat when she'd let him stay up late and watch the reruns with her on _Nick at Nite_. That was before _Nick at Nite_ started showing newer, lamer sitcoms in place of the classics. To this day, _I Love Lucy_ was the one thing that always made Kurt feel better.

He was less than five minutes into an episode when his door flew open and Finn came in.

"Don't you knock!" Kurt snapped.

"Dude…" Finn shot back at him. "It was you, wasn't it!"

Kurt had no idea what he was talking about. "What, did someone eat the last of the frosted flakes?"

"You…!" Finn was wagging an accusatory finger at him. "It was you in the bedroom with Sam last night! I've gone over it in my head about fifty-dozen times and I've figured it out. Everyone else was accounted for. Where were you, huh?"

"We were talking." Kurt tried.

Finn wasn't hearing it. "So I guess this means the break up is really serious."

"Guess so," Kurt looked at his screen, hoping he could appear to be distracted and Finn would give up and walk away.

"I can't believe Sam's actually gay. I just lost twenty bucks to Artie."

"That's awful, Finn," Kurt scolded. "And you didn't loose anything. He's not gay."

"Well, the bet was just that you and Sam would hook up before the end of summer. I said no, no way you and Blaine would break up but…hey look at this!"

Kurt sat completely still. He pointed a hand at the door. "Leave, Finn." He said tonelessly.

Finn gave him a wicked smile, similar to the one Rachel had given him when she'd realized the truth, then turned around and coolly left Kurt alone.

Kurt put his hands over his face and breathed deeply. Okay, now Finn and Rachel both knew. Hopefully, they'd keep it to themselves. He realized that it was unlikely that either of them would spread this. It wouldn't benefit Rachel in anyway, and Finn didn't want to loose twenty bucks. It was safe. No one was going to find out what a slut he'd been.

Twenty seconds later Kurt's phone buzzed on the nightstand. He had a text from Sam.

_Yeah, Finn knows…. _

Kurt replied, _just ignore him. He'll have his fun with you but he won't tell. _

_That's good. _

Kurt didn't feel the need to reply. He put his phone back on the nightstand, but then it buzzed again.

Sam had said, _look, can we talk soon? _

Kurt was a little embarrassed that Sam thought a formal rejection was necessary. Kurt knew what the previous night had meant. He wrote back, _that's not necessary. We can really just forget it happened, Sam. _

Sam replied, _No, I really want to talk to you. _

And suddenly, Kurt went rigid. Oh god. What if it had meant something to Sam? What if he was the one who had to do the rejecting? What if Sam was actually gay?

_We're talking now, aren't we? _Kurt asked.

_I wanna do this in person._ Sam said.

Kurt bit his lip as he tried to think of what to say. It would just be heartless to say no, wouldn't it be? _Fine. When? _

_Whenever you're free_

Kurt wanted to lie, and tell Sam that he was booked from then until school started. But instead, he found himself typing. _Come over._

* * *

><p>"Obviously, I'm a little…confused…" Sam told him as they sat side by side on the foot of Kurt's bed.<p>

"Obviously…" Kurt said uncomfortably.

"You see…when I said I'd been wanting to try…erm…_that_…I meant, like, I was curious and then the alcohol took over and…"

"Sam, really…It's fine. I completely understand." Although the more he actually thought about it, the harder it was for him to understand. Sam couldn't really be _straight_. Not after that…but then again, Blaine was still gay after hooking up with Rachel.

"No, it's not fine," Sam told him. "I don't know what it means, Kurt! I don't know why I had an urge like that, and it's kind of freaking me out."

"Well that's logical." Kurt tried, but it didn't calm Sam down.

"That's what I keep telling myself. I mean, just because I'm _curious_ about other guys doesn't mean I'm, like, hot for them…"

"Definitely not," Although it seemed like Sam was trying a little _too_ hard to justify his actions. Kurt wished that he could comfort him, but he really didn't know what to say. It didn't seem like Sam was really listening to him anyway. He was just sort of ranting, which Kurt thought was fine, although he kind of just wanted to go back to watching _I Love Lucy_ and considering the pros and cons to being single.

"But what if it does…? What if I like guys? Oh god. My parents would…well…they'd be okay with it…but would I be okay with it? Would I be able to deal with the guys on the football team, like, _knowing_ I think some of them are attractive…Dear god."

"Sam. What do you want me to do?" Kurt finally told him impatiently. "This doesn't sound like anything I can help you with."

Sam hesitated. He stood and said, "I think I need to kiss you again."

Kurt smiled politely. His face was unmoving. He just blinked. "Oh…?"

"Just as an experiment…!" Sam reasoned. "I know you just got out of a relationship, and I wouldn't want to toy with your emotions!"

"Never…"

"So, can I do it?" Sam licked his large lips, shoving his hands uncomfortably in his pockets.

Kurt considered the suggestion, and sadly realized that he couldn't think of any reason to say no. It seemed like it would shut Sam up and move him along, which was what Kurt wanted.

"Fine," He sighed, standing up and going over to the taller boy. He stood facing him and draped one arm over his shoulder, putting the other hand in Sam's hair exactly as he had done the night before. He quickly leaned in.

Sam kissed back gently. He ran his hands down Kurt's back, but unlike at the party, stopped before he reached his ass.

Kurt realized that Sam was a really good kisser. He was actually better than Blaine, which surprised him. He let Sam take the lead, and realized he could do it for a while, if he really had to…it was pleasant enough.

But that wasn't his call…

They kissed for about two minutes, and then Sam pulled away, looking solemn.

"Did you feel anything notable?" Kurt asked. His tone could only be described as friendly.

Sam pressed his lips together, his eyebrows scrunching up as he thought. "I really…I don't know what it's supposed to feel like…"

"Oh…?" Kurt sighed. He had nothing else to say.

Suddenly Carol's voice called to him from upstairs. "Kurt!"

"Yeah…?" He called back.

"Blaine's here!"

And suddenly it was like someone hit pause. Sam obviously understood that that was a big deal: Blaine being there. Neither of them knew what to do. Should they tell him Sam was there? Would Blaine figure out why Sam was there? Both of their minds raced, and they were paralyzed.

"Kurt!" Carol called again.

"Dude, I'm sorry…I'll leave," Sam said quietly; almost responsibly. He started toward the door.

"No!" Kurt shouted. "I mean…yeah. I mean…" He didn't know what he was saying. Part of him didn't want Blaine to even see Sam leaving. He knew he was paranoid. Blaine wouldn't figure it out, would he? And why would it matter. Blaine had broken up with him. It's not like he had any right to care. But Kurt still felt guilty. He didn't want to hurt Blaine. He loved Blaine.

He still loved Blaine. Blaine was here. Why would he be here? Why would he even bother talking to Kurt if he was _that_ serious about breaking up? Oh god. What had he done...?

"Kurt…?" It was Blaine's voice. He was right outside Kurt's bedroom door.

_Shit _Kurt mouthed. "Um…I'm naked!" He cried. He grabbed Sam and started shoving him across the room toward the closet. He pushed him inside and was careful not to make any noise as he closed the door. "Come in Blaine!"

The door flew open and Blaine entered determinedly. His eyes were filled with sadness and he threw his arms around him. "I'm so sorry. I was completely out of line yesterday. I was up all night trying to get comfortable with the idea of being broken up and I just couldn't do it!"

"Blaine…" Kurt said weakly, hugging him back, realizing that it felt so good to be held by someone who really loved him. He'd been so mad at Blaine for ending it. That was what it was; anger. Now he suddenly felt as if he could forgive him for everything. "I'm sorry, Blaine. I wasn't thinking yesterday. You know I want to spend time with you, I do. I just…I like spending time with my friends too."

"And I need to respect that you have a life!" Blaine agreed. "Look, I love you. I don't want this to be over. Please give me a second chance."

Kurt had almost forgotten about the boy in his closet. Suddenly, his main concern was somehow getting Sam out without Blaine knowing. "Of course I'll give you a second chance."

Blaine kissed him fiercely. He worked hard to kiss back without it being clear that he was distracted.

"Hey!" Kurt suddenly pulled away. "You know, I think we should go for a drive. We should go grab some lunch and celebrate!"

"I already ate," Blaine said. "Besides, I'd rather be alone with you and make up properly." He wiggled his triangular eyebrows scandalously.

Kurt swallowed. He thought about what would happen if he and Blaine did what he and Sam had done. Blaine would think it was his first time… "I'm…um…hungry…" Kurt said, clutching his stomach.

"Kurt…" Blaine whined softly. "Just, like, ten minutes…"

Sam. Was. In. The. Closet. Hearing. Everything.

"We'll make up when I'm filled up," Kurt said cutely. He grabbed his boyfriend's hands and led him out of the room.

* * *

><p>They went to <em>The Lima Bean<em> and got Coffee and sandwiches. The entire drive there, Blaine talked about how upset he'd been all night and morning, and how he was feeling nothing but relief now.

When they were sitting down, Blaine asked, "So, how was your night?"

Kurt could tell that Blaine expected him to have a similar story. He couldn't lie completely though. "Oh. I went to Rachel's."

Blaine forced himself to keep smiling. "Oh. How was that?"

Kurt's memory leapt back to him cumming in Sam's mouth. "Fun…"

"You had trouble enjoying yourself, didn't you?" Blaine said knowingly.

"Yes." Kurt shoved his sandwich in his mouth and took a huge bite so that Blaine would be forced to keep talking about himself.

"I feel so bad. If we had just gone together, none of this would've happened."

"Mhmmm…"

He wasn't _lying_ to Blaine. Blaine wasn't asking if he'd hooked up with anyone.

"I mean…I shouldn't have tried to pressure you into staying home…Hey!" Blaine looked at something over Kurt's shoulder. "Finn and Rachel are here!"

It was official. There was a God, and he hated Kurt Hummel.

"Kurt and Blaine…!" Finn was horrible at hiding his confusion. "…Together…drinking coffee as if they never broke up…"

Rachel slapped her boyfriend on the arm. Kurt glared at the two of them. They were horribly obvious.

Rachel narrowed her eyes at Kurt. "So I guess you two just had a fight then…?"

"Yeah," Blaine sighed happily, starring dreamily at Kurt just like the first time he'd told him he loved him. "But we're perfect again…"

"Oh, well…then we'll just…leave you alone," Rachel spun around and darted toward the counter. Finn trailed behind her but kept throwing awkward glances over his shoulder as he went.

Blaine blinked, looking amused. "Any idea why they're so jumpy…?" He asked.

Okay. This was the first time Kurt was forced to lie. "No. None at all…"

Blaine shook his head, "They were acting really strange."

Kurt shrugged. "I think they had sex last night…"


	3. Chapter 3

The Evans' had a new apartment. It was in Lima Heights Adjacent, near where Santana lived. Kurt had been to see Sam once or twice. Ever since he found out about Sam's money issues back in March, he'd been helping cook for the meals on wheels program at Quinn's church (he felt superior knowing that he was doing it because he wanted to and not because he thought it would get him admission to heaven), and clearly Sam's family was a regular customer. This evening, however, he waited outside the door empty handed.

He'd just spent an hour in Blaine's car. After the whole "making up" goal was achieved (fully clothed kissing, because that's what he and Blaine did), Kurt told Blaine that he was tired from the party and wanted to call it a day and go lay down. As soon as Blaine had pulled out of his driveway, however, Kurt made a beeline for his car.

Of course, he had texted Sam to make sure he'd gotten out of the house okay. When Blaine asked who he was texting, and he lied and said "Mercedes", he felt guilty and started to ignore Sam's texts. Kurt knew that he was the bad guy here: one-hundred percent. He was probably making Sam feel cheap, and Blaine didn't deserve to be lied to. He knew he had to make at least part of this right.

Stacy Evans answered the door. "What are you doing here?" She asked him. Her tone was kind of rude but Kurt cut her some slack, because she was six and all, and he question was probably just rooted in curiosity.

Mrs. Evans came up behind her daughter. "Stacy, you know you're not supposed to open the door without Mommy. There are some bad people in this neighborhood."

"It's okay Mrs. Evans, it's just me," He waved awkwardly.

Her face lit up when she noticed him. "Kurt! It's been a while!"

"Is Sam here?" He asked immediately.

"Of course he is. He'd be with you if he wasn't."

For a second, Kurt didn't know what the woman meant. Then, he realized that it sort of made sense. He and Sam hung out with the same people. They were invited to the same gatherings. Now that he and Mercedes were over, Sam wouldn't be leaving the house for much else.

Mrs. Evans opened the door a little wider and let Kurt into the run-down apartment. "He's been holed-up in his room since he got back from your house. I don't know what you kids all did last night, but apparently it was quite exhausting."

Kurt forced a smile. "Just…you know…a game of tag…" He said lightly.

Her eyes narrowed skeptically, but she nodded in acceptance and gestured to the nearby hallway. "Why don't you just go knock on his door?"

So that's what Kurt did.

"It's open!" Sam called.

Kurt cautiously opened the door. His eyes were not prepared for what he found on the other side.

Sam was sitting on the edge of his bed, wearing this skin-tight wife-beater and nice-fitting gym shorts. He was lifting a weight, and somehow, the one, dim light in the room managed to reflect off his flexing bicep perfectly. Kurt inhaled sharply, and quickly looked down at the carpet. He realized that beer goggles were a myth. If anything, Sam's body was even hotter when Kurt was sober.

When he'd been drunk, he gave little thought to his attraction to Sam. Now, standing in front of him in his bedroom, Kurt realized how unfamiliar these kinds of feelings were to him. Sure, he'd always liked guys, but no guy had ever made him feel so...on edge. It was like; suddenly he understood the "horny teenage boy" stereotype. Sam made something click in Kurt. It was terrifying.

Sam put down his weight when he saw Kurt and stood up, wiping his sweaty palms on his shorts. "Kurt…" He started.

Kurt shook his head, trying to keep his cool, and interrupted Sam. "I'm sorry." He said quickly. "…About Blaine, I mean…and shoving you in my closet and ignoring you all day…"

"I'm sorry!" Sam shot back at him. "I shouldn't have come over. I should've never done anything with you…this is entirely my fault."

"No, Sam, you have nothing to apologize for!" Kurt felt bad that he thought he did, but also thought it was kind of sweet. It made him feel a little better about the whole nightmare of a situation.

"Kurt. You're one of my best friends; I'm not gunna lie,"

"I know that…" Kurt nodded sweetly. Although neither of them had actually _told _the other anything like that. They never really hung out one-on-one unless Kurt was helping Sam's family. But whenever they were in groups they always sort of ended up together. Kurt guessed it made sense that Sam thought of their friendship as being particularly close.

"I would never forgive myself if I fucked up your perfect relationship," Sam told him.

Kurt smiled sadly. He really appreciated Sam's integrity. He said, "You're too selfless, Sam Evans."

Sam smiled goofily. "I try, you know?"

Kurt adored that big, cocky smile of his. Out of all the faces Sam ever made, that one was his favorite. It was such a change from the nervous glances he'd showcased in Kurt's room earlier. Kurt suddenly remembered how confused and freaked-out Sam had been, and realized that it was improbable that anything had changed.

"You could use a friend right now, couldn't you?"

"I have more than one friend, Kurt…" Sam said matter-of-factly.

"I mean…someone who understands," Kurt was clearly referencing Sam's impending homosexuality. He hoped that Sam realized that. "You can trust me, you know?"

Sam was avoiding eye contact. He nodded solemnly at the floor.

"I just…" Kurt swallowed, struggling to make his final point. "…I can't be an active part of the experimentation process, you know?"

"Right," Sam agreed promptly. "…You know…because of Blaine."

"Exactly," He should have been relieved that Sam understood, but part of him hesitated to accept it. Why was part of him disappointed that Sam didn't argue…?

Horny. Teenage. Boy.

* * *

><p>"I think we should do something," Kurt said into his phone as soon as he was in his car.<p>

"When…?" Blaine asked, surprised. "…now…?"

"Yeah," Kurt told him urgently.

"I thought you wanted to sleep."

"I caught a second wind," Kurt shrugged breathlessly. He wanted to be subtle, but it was kind of hard to contain himself. "I don't think we made up enough…" There was an awkward pause. "…Blaine…?"

"Kurt…" He heard Blaine trying to stay collected. "Is this a booty call?"

"I love you, Blaine," Kurt told him. Because that's all that mattered, and it was supposed to be even better when you loved someone.

"I love you too, Kurt, but that doesn't answer my question."

"Just meet me at my house," He said. "It's date night. My parents aren't home."

"And what will happen if I tell you no?"

"Bad things, Blaine warbler," Kurt said wickedly. "Very bad things…"

* * *

><p>Kurt was standing on his front porch when Blaine pulled into the driveway. Kurt noticed he forgot to lock his car when he climbed out of it, but he didn't feel like saying anything.<p>

"This is exciting," Blaine's lips curled. "I've never been booty called before."

Kurt went down the front steps toward his boyfriend, meeting him halfway down the front walk. "Just shut up and kiss me!"

Blaine slowly kissed him like he always did; sweetly. Kurt revved up the intensity, prying Blaine's mouth open with his tongue. Blaine seemed a bit caught off guard but went along with it, tightening his arms around Kurt. Kurt finally pulled his lips away and with his hands on Blaine's shoulders, whispered in his ear. "I think we should try some new things tonight."

Kurt backed up and proudly observed Blaine's dazed smirk. Blaine just nodded. Kurt took charge, grabbing the shorter boy's hand and tugging him up onto the porch and leading him into the house. Blaine habitually started taking of his shoes at the front mat. Kurt laughed cutely at him, and then started taking off his own shoes. Once they were both in just socks, Kurt hopped closer to Blaine and took his head in his hands, backing him up against the doors of the coat closet. "Come upstairs," He said. He was actually proud of himself for effectively speaking seductively.

They were walking down the upstairs hallway when Finn popped out of his room, a bowl of Lucky Charms in his hands. "I thought I heard something. Kurt, I thought you were going to S…" _Sam's…_Kurt froze, biting his lips and waiting for Finn to ruin everything. But Finn caught himself. "Super Target…to get…um...bagels…?"

"No. No bagels, Finn."

"Oh. Well. What are you two up to?" Finn asked.

"We were going to work on some songs…" Blaine started.

But Kurt was already saying. "…watch a movie…"

Finn made a face that showed that he was sorry he'd asked, because now he knew too much. "Well, you two just keep safe, all right…?" He disappeared into his room, slamming the door behind him and leaving the couple in the hallway.

Blaine followed Kurt into his room and shut the door. The two of them just stood there for a moment, watching each other in anticipation, neither of them sure who should make the first move. Suddenly, Blaine remembered and spun around to click the lock on Kurt's door. They both started to giggle. Blaine took a step toward his boyfriend.

"Hi…" He breathed.

"Hello…" Kurt grinned.

For an instant he thought he should tell him. But the idea vanished from his mind the instant Blaine kissed him again.

"So what did you have in mind…?" Blaine asked him, pushing him onto his bed.

Kurt answered immediately. "I want to give you head," He offered it before he asked for it because, you know, manners were always important to him.

Blaine let out another exasperated chuckle, as he. "Really…?"

"Unless you don't want me to…"

"Of course I do." Blaine said. "I just…wow…I wasn't expecting this."

Kurt's stomach churned. He knew he was about to be rejected. Maybe he was rushing things. "We don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with, Blaine."

"Kurt, no," Blaine said rapidly. "No…I really, _really _want to. I never thought _you'd_ be the one to suggest anything though. I mean, what happened to the boy who freaked out at the very mention of sex?"

Kurt sighed, frustrated. "Oh, I don't know," He said lightly. "He had a couple drinks one night and had a revelation." He made it sound sarcastic, so Blaine just smiled.

"I just have to say," Blaine told him. "You make my job a lot easier."

"So…we should do it…?" Kurt's heart was pounding now.

"Yes. Definitely…We should do it….Right now…" Blaine smacked the mattress determinedly.

"Okay, then!"

And then they sat there for a few seconds.

"So…how do we do this?" Blaine asked coolly. "Do we, just, like…take our pants off and follow our whims?"

Kurt blinked.

"Sorry…" Blaine went on, his cheeks flushing. "Maybe we shouldn't talk about it…maybe we should just…"

"No…" Kurt wanted him to be comfortable, so he put on a confident face. "…That sounds…okay…we can just…" Kurt jumped ship and took off his shirt. Blaine watched him, his eyes sparkling. Then, Kurt reached forward and helped him out of his.

They both got off the bed and turned away from each other as they climbed out of their pants and underwear. Kurt realized how awkward this was going to be, and rushed to turn the lights off before Blaine could look at him.

Blaine's voice came at him through the dark. "Come here…" He said softly.

Kurt turned around, his eyes adjusting to the dark. He could still make out Blaine's shadow. He was nervous. Of course he was nervous. But the one thing that made him feel better was that he wasn't exactly clueless. He knew what to do. He knew because Sam had showed him. And as inappropriate as it was in this particular situation for him to be thankful for that, he was.

* * *

><p>They lay side by side what seems like only minutes later, holding each other's hand under the cover.<p>

"That was good…" Blaine told Kurt, almost reassuringly. "Was I good…?"

"Of course," Kurt said simply. _But not as good as Sam..._

He was miserable realizing that. It made him feel like a horrible person. He couldn't help it that Sam happened to be a natural, but for some reason it made him feel like what happened was, like, an elevated level of cheating. Not that it was even technically cheating. Blaine had broken up with him…

"I love you." Kurt told Blaine. And that was the only thing that made it better, right? It actually meant something with Blaine…right?

"I love you too, Kurt."

And at that moment, Kurt was hit by a wave of panic. He'd needed to prove something to himself: that being attracted to other boys was not necessary, but all he'd managed to do was give him more reason to doubt. Suddenly, he realized that it shouldn't have been about him. He realized that he had just dug the hole deeper. He had just taken a part of Blaine Anderson under false pretenses. Yes, that was what he had done, and now that he'd figured it out, he realized it would kill him. It would kill both of them.

Kurt took Blaine in his arms and let the dark-haired boy nestle his cheek in his chest. Blaine closed his eyes and yawned. He seemed so peaceful; so at ease. That's when Kurt knew he had to protect Blaine. He could never know about Sam.


	4. Chapter 4

"I feel like it's been forever…" Mercedes said. She and Kurt were standing side by side in front of the Pierces' fire pit, a week after the party at Rachel's. Each of them was roasting a marshmallow on a long pair of tongs. "We need to catch up soon. I have so much to tell you."

"Me too," Kurt agreed, wishing that he really could tell her everything that had been going on with him lately. Just like he hadn't known when Mercedes and Sam broke up, Mercedes didn't know about him and Blaine's recent problems. They hadn't even been broken up long enough to change their relationship statuses on Facebook.

"We'll have a sleepover soon, just the two of us," Mercedes promised him. "But not this week; I open pretty much every morning."

"That's quite all right,' Kurt assured her, part of him wishing he'd gotten a job himself this summer.

They took their marshmallows away from the flames and stepped over to the nearby picnic table where graham crackers and chocolate were waiting for them. Sam was there putting a s'more together which Kurt had to admit, really impressed him. First Pizza; now this! Sam was really getting away from his food issues. He looked up at Kurt and Mercedes and sort of froze up. Kurt suddenly realized that standing with both of them might be awkward for him. He wanted to assure Sam that Mercedes was blissfully oblivious that Kurt had hooked up with her ex. But that would sort of destroy the point.

"It's such a nice night," Kurt said pleasantly, grabbing a graham cracker, trying to make conversation as if nothing was weird.

Sam pressed his lips together, glancing back and forth between the two of them. "I'm gunna go sit…" He said quickly, and then left them alone.

Mercedes turned and watch Sam walk away. "I'm sorry that was so awkward," She told her friend. "Things ended sort of weirdly between us."

Shit. "I wasn't aware…" Kurt said coyly.

"Yeah…I'll tell you all about it when we have our sleepover."

Kurt could wait.

They took their s'mores over to the fire and were planting themselves on one of the long benches, next to Mike and Tina.

"Did you guys find the chocolate okay?" Britt asked hospitably from the other side of the fire pit. She was quite committed to being a good hostess.

"Yes, Britt. Thank you," Kurt told her. Over her shoulder he could see Blaine and Rachel coming out of the house and crossing the yard toward them. "Hey guys!"

Kurt noticed Sam turn around to see who was coming, then quickly snap back around and bow his head, shoving what was left of his s'more into his mouth. Kurt wondered if maybe he shouldn't have come; if maybe he shouldn't have invited his boyfriend. But everyone was there. He didn't want people asking where he was. What if Sam tried to explain it?

"Hello, my sweet," Blaine grinned at him and kissed him on the cheek. Kurt reached out and pulled his boyfriend into his lap, offering him a bite of s'more, which Blaine graciously accepted. Sam just stared into the fire, a strange look of intensity in his eye.

"Hey, Evans, you okay?" Puck asked.

Sam looked up, and forced an unconvincing smile. "I'm fine. I'm just kind of tired."

"Man, that sucks…Drink some Mountain Dew or something. We wouldn't want to loose you." Blaine said. He'd been working really hard to be nice to all of the guys to prove that there were no longer any jealousy issues. When he spoke directly to Sam, though, Kurt's stomach went up in knots.

Kurt remembered the decision he'd made just days earlier in his bedroom. There was a large part of him that was embarrassed for Blaine, and he had the brief urge to take him aside immediately and tell him the truth; just to spare him any further humiliation. Then, he realized he needed to stay strong. Blaine couldn't know anything. All the truth would do was cause Blaine pain.

"Thanks for the tip, man," Sam said to Blaine nicely, still avoiding eye contact. He stood up and went to the cooler that Brittany had put out.

Blaine rested his head on Kurt's as he fed him another bite of s'more. "Yeah, he does seem kind of out of it…" He whispered curiously.

Kurt was silent. He had no response.

"Kurt!" Rachel suddenly jumped in. He knew by the judgmental tone in her voice that she'd been paying very close attention to his conversation. "I left a sweatshirt in my car. Do you wanna come with me to get it?"

"Hey, I'll come with you!" Finn offered. She shot him a death glare and he realized his mistake. "…Sorry…Kurt, go with her."

Blaine got off Kurt's lap and let him leave with Rachel. Kurt knew that Blaine had probably figured out that Rachel didn't really need a sweatshirt. He was sweet enough not to ask questions though.

Rachel marched into the front yard and spun around, her nostrils flaring. "You need to talk to him."

"I don't see what good it'll do."

"Kurt, if you really love Blaine then you'll do the right thing and tell him the truth!" She shouted.

"Keep it down. They'll hear you."

"Kurt, do you know how bad I felt when I found out everyone knew about Finn and Santana but me?" There was a sad sense of desperation in her voice. "It might even be too late for you to come clean to Blaine without consequences, but believe me when I say that the longer you wait…the worse it's going to be."

Kurt stood completely still. He felt tears coming to his eyes. "I can't…Rachel…" He was shaking. His began to wring his hands. "You don't understand…I just…can't…"

"You made a mistake, Kurt," She told him comfortingly, walking to him and placing a palm on his arm. "I know how it is. I've made my fair share of mistakes as well…either way you play this; you're going to hurt him. And I can imagine the guilt your feeling, and I can only assume that…you're hurting yourself too."

Kurt broke down. It was the biggest release of emotions he'd had since Blaine had suggested a "break". "I'm a horrible person," He whimpered. Rachel took him in her arms. "I don't know why I did it. I thought he'd never want me again."

"Just tell him that, Kurt." She urged. "Tell him tonight."

Kurt hesitated. "…I don't think I can…"

"Just think about it," Rachel said. "Come on. I'll go get my sweatshirt to make this look legit and we'll go back to the party. You don't have to decide anything this second."

As they went back into Brittney's backyard, Kurt tried his hardest to put on a happy face and act like everything was perfect. He saw Blaine over by the snack table and went to stand by him.

"You guys were gone for a while," Blaine observed casually, not looking at Kurt because he was focused on the s'more he was building. He had several of them prepared on his plate already, and held it out to Kurt as he finished the last one. "Here, I made some for you."

Kurt swallowed hard, looking sadly down at the treats.

"Kurt…" Blaine tried to make out his boyfriend's face in the dim light. "What's wrong, have you been crying?"

Tears were coming to Kurt's eyes again and he clenched his jaw. He couldn't do this. Blaine had made him s'mores like a good, perfect boyfriend would do. The guilt was finally overpowering him. He sniffed.

"Hey…" Blaine said gently, taking Kurt's head in his hand and pushing the plate closer to him. "It's okay…have a s'more. Whatever it is, the deliciousness will make it better."

And Kurt felt himself shoving Blaine away. "No…stay away from me," He said quietly. He just couldn't bear to have Blaine comfort him when he would hate him soon enough.

Blaine's face fell. "Why. Kurt. What's the matter?"

Over by the fire all his friends were laughing about a joke someone had told. It was good. It meant no one was watching him.

Kurt had to tell him now. There was no going back. "I hooked up with Sam."

The group had started singing a hip-hop rendition of "Kumbaya" with Artie beat-boxing. It was something Kurt would've enjoyed had Blaine not been staring at him in shock.

After a moment, Blaine dropped his plate back on the table and darted off toward the house.

"Blaine! Stop!" Kurt cried after him. His friends' singing suddenly stopped. _Now_ he was creating a spectacle.

He chased Blaine around the house and into the front yard, where he and Rachel had been talking minutes earlier.

"What the hell, Kurt…?" Blaine spun around and screamed, now that they were alone. His voice was shaking, and Kurt knew it was only a matter of time before they were both crying.

"It was at Rachel's party!" Kurt shouted desperately. "It was the night we broke up. You broke up with me!"

"We had a _fight_, Kurt; that was not a break up!"

"No!" Kurt shouted defensively. "You told me you didn't want me to be your boyfriend!"

"I was back the next day," Blaine snapped. "I loved you, Kurt. You just…you pissed me off and I need time to breath!"

"If that's all you wanted, then you shouldn't have told me you were breaking up with me!"

"I didn't know what I was saying!"

"That doesn't mean you can claim you never said it!"

"I bet you two were just thrilled, weren't you? You were finally free to whore around together, now that the old _ball and chain_ wasn't holding you down anymore! Seriously, Kurt, you were just waiting for me to break up with you so you could justify it!"

"Blaine, no…!" Kurt sobbed. "That's not what happened."

"I didn't know that this relationship was about you humoring me, Kurt."

"It's not! I love you! I was upset!"

Blaine wasn't even listening anymore. He was putting the pieces together in his head. "…what did you two even do! Did you have sex with him!"

"No!"

"So, just kissing…? Or more…?" He waited for Kurt to answer, but the silence did it for him. "And then, you and me…the next night…" Blaine's voice weakened. He was becoming hysterical. He covered his mouth, trying to get a deep breath through his nose. "Oh god…And you just kept it from me!"

"I'm sorry, Blaine…" Kurt sobbed. "I really love you."

"No you don't!" Blaine's voice reached a volume that Kurt didn't know was humanly possible. "You and he were just a matter of time; everyone knew! But you told me he was straight, and…god…I actually thought you wouldn't cheat. I guess I'm really the idiot here."

"I didn't cheat!" Kurt tried one last time.

"Yeah, well, you might as well have…" Blaine sneered. "Go to hell, Kurt."

And then, he was gone.

Kurt watched Blaine's car disappear down the street. He thought for a minute that he might actually stop breathing.

"Kurt…?" A deep voice said through the darkness. Kurt looked over his shoulder. Sam slowly came toward him.

He knew it was wrong, and he knew it wouldn't help anything, but he needed the comfort. He didn't care that Sam had clearly followed them. He didn't care that Sam had overstepped by eavesdropping on the conversation. He let Sam hug him. Because at that point, all he really needed was a hug.


	5. Chapter 5

The faint sounds of their friends' conversations carried from the backyard to the front stoop where Kurt and Sam were sitting.

"You don't have to stay here with me," Kurt told him. Actually, Sam being there was kind of making everything worse. He was just a reminder of everything that had gone wrong. Kurt wanted more than anything to go home and cry himself to sleep, but Finn was his ride, and he felt bad making him leave early, not that Finn would take him if he asked.

"Dude, I'm not just going to leave you crying by yourself on Brittney's porch!" Sam told him. "Especially not since I'm the reason you're crying…"

"You're not," Kurt wiped his nose on the back of his hand. "Blaine is…I mean…I am. I brought this upon myself."

Sam patted Kurt on the back awkwardly.

"God…" Kurt coughed. "I'm such a woman."

"What…?" Sam didn't comprehend.

"I'm a hot mess. I'm too emotional."

"Hey, dude! I'd be crying too if it happened to me…" Sam patted him on the back. "When Quinn and I broke up I kept it together at school, but I went home and cried like a four-year-old. I guess…you know…I was more in Blaine's position there…"

Kurt laughed in disbelief. "I appreciate your efforts to comfort me, Sam, but I feel bad enough as it is."

"Hey!" Sam defended himself. "I'm on your side! I feel bad that this all happened, but it really does sound like you two were on a break! I'm not just saying that because it makes me feel better. I'm siding with you for the same reason I sided with Ross over Rachel!"

"Oh dear lord…" Kurt realized. "You're Chloe-the-copy-girl!"

Sam sighed. "There are worse things I could be."

"Well, if I had to cheat with anyone, I'm glad it was a _Friends_ fan…" Kurt said dryly.

"First off, you didn't cheat."

"Right..." Kurt rolled his eyes.

"And secondly…everyone with a soul is a _Friends_ fan. It's a television classic."

"You say 'classic' as if it's _I Love Lucy_ or something…"

"Please!" Sam snapped. "Those shows are only memorable because they were, like, the first things on television! _Friends_ lives on for it's own reason!"

"You take that back."

"I will not!"

"Have you ever even seen _Lucy_? It's gold."

"I could never get into it. It's so slapstick."

"I can't believe that I'm hearing this…"

"What, are you saying you genuinely like I Love Lucy?"

"I have the complete series on DVD…" Kurt said proudly. He was glad that they were getting off topic. He was glad to be distracted and hoped Sam would completely forget why they were on the porch in the first place.

"Oh my god…" Sam laughed into his hand. "You so would…"

"What's that supposed to mean!" Kurt grinned.

"All the things you see at the store and say to yourself 'nobody will ever actually buy that'…those are the things you own!" Sam teased.

Kurt laughed, only mildly insulted. "You're going to have to provide other examples for your argument to be valid…"

"A bedazzler, Kurt. You own a bedazzler…"

"Every show choir needs a good bedazzler..."

"Do you ever actually use it though?"

"On occasion…"

"And also, I have it on good authority that you bought a Ped-egg…and a Snuggie…"

"Okay. I would never buy a snuggie."

"Mhmmm…okay," Sam played like he didn't believe him.

"Besides, we're talking about two different things. I Love Lucy is great television. Owning the DVDs is nothing like owning a Ped-egg."

"So you do own a Ped-egg…"

"Yes. The silky souls of my feet and I aren't ashamed of it."

Sam cackled. "_I Love Lucy_ is lame. I'd accept _Dick Van Dyke_, but that's about it."

"At least we can agree on liking Dick…" Sam put his face in his palm and giggled immaturely. Kurt rolled his eyes and kept talking, unfazed. "…Not that your approval fuels my existence..."

"Damn it, and here I was thinking the dynamic was mutual…" He nudged Kurt playfully.

Kurt laughed, though the sudden mention of any kind of feelings reminded him of Blaine. He went quickly back into his depression, and frowned at his lap.

"Hey…" Sam sighed. "Don't go back to this. You were finally cheering up."

Kurt tried to smile. "I just…" He didn't know if he should speak his mind or not. Maybe talking about this with Sam was inappropriate. "…I just can't believe it's really over."

Sam slumped over a little, licking his lips in thought. "You guys really had something special…" He agreed, almost reluctantly. "I mean, you deserve a guy who will do stuff like that: like serenading you on the steps of the school and…like…dancing with you when your prom king is a douche."

Kurt shrugged. He didn't want to think about those things. Now, all that he wanted to count was Blaine's constant jealousy, and the mellow-dramatics leading up to the first break-up, and the way his words stung when he left Kurt earlier that night. He wished that Sam would tell him that he should give up on Blaine; that he deserved better. That's really what Kurt wanted to hear. That's really what would make him feel better. When Sam reminded Kurt of how great Blaine was, it only made Kurt feel like he was the only one who had ever done anything wrong. "I screwed up. I shouldn't have lied to him…"

"You never wanted to hurt him," Sam seemed to understand. "I didn't want you to either. But, technically he hurt you first."

Kurt replied softly, "He did…"

"But, you need to be happy, dude," Sam told him. "If you want him back, then you should go get him."

"How do you suggest I do that, Sam? You saw how mad he was!"

"You know, it's not impossible. I don't think that anything is impossible when it comes to love…"

Kurt's ears perked up at those words. He'd told himself that every day when he'd liked Finn. But he'd proven his own theory wrong, hadn't he. Maybe Sam was right though, maybe Blaine would be different.

"Why are you doing this?" Kurt asked him simply. "You're some sort of coy philanthropist now?"

"I don't know what that means…" Sam replied awkwardly. "I'd just feel better if I could help you."

Kurt sighed. He couldn't believe Sam was being so cool. "You're a good friend, Sam."

"Yeah," Sam nodded. "You're not so bad yourself…"

Although Kurt had trouble believing that he meant it.

* * *

><p>Kurt woke up the next morning to voices outside his door.<p>

"You go in!" Carol was hissing.

"He's not going to want to talk, Carol." His dad hissed back.

Kurt rolled onto his stomach and pulled his pillow over his head. His dad was right. He didn't want to talk.

"Mom, this is going to make it worse," Finn told her. "He's going to hate me for telling you guys."

Kurt heard his door open. "Kurt…honey…" Carol was coming toward his bed. "I made you French toast."

Kurt was exposed to daylight as Burt pulled open his shades and Carol took the pillow off his head. He glared at Finn, who was coming toward him sheepishly with breakfast on a tray.

"We heard about you and Blaine, honey," Carol sat on his bed and hugged him. "Your father and I just wanted you to know that we're here for you…if you ever want to talk."

"Oh dear god," Kurt mumbled.

"Hey, it was her idea to try to get you to open up!" Burt defended himself loudly. "I told her that guys take break ups differently. We have to take it like men…escape from it all…go shoot some game."

"I don't want to go hunting, Dad."

"But if you did, I could get Greg to run shop; I could take a few days off."

"Dad…!" Kurt said again. "I don't want to go hunting."

"I'm really sorry, Man," Finn set the tray on the end of his bed. "I just sort of told them…I mean, it just sort of happened. I didn't expect them to want to, like, _do_ something about it."

"Break ups are hard," Carol continued, trying to take her stepson's hand in her own. Kurt pulled it away. "We know Blaine was your first love."

"Mom, come on, let's just leave the food," Finn said uneasily.

"Kurt, honey," Carol looked at him sweetly. "Would you like to be alone?"

Kurt hesitated. He was pretty uncomfortable. As much as he didn't want to offend his family, it was a little too much for him to handle. "Yes, that would be fantastic." He said tonelessly.

Burt and Finn strolled out of the room without another word. Carol lingered though. "Just give me a holler if…"

Finn interrupted, calling from the hallway. "…Mom!"

"Thank you, Carol," Kurt said genuinely, because he really did appreciate the efforts.

Carol shot him one last apologetic glance, and then she was gone.

Kurt looked over at his sympathy French toast and realized regretfully that there was no way he'd be able to stomach it. He felt nervous; anxious for everything to be settled for real. He really didn't need his step-mother to pamper him. He didn't want his family to think he was grieving. Sam had convinced him the night before to try to get Blaine back. Nothing seemed final. His relationship wasn't dead yet.

He grabbed his phone, and found that a new message from Mercedes was waiting in his inbox.

_I get off work at noon…Wanna do lunch at the sticks? _

He knew she would have questions, and he knew that after the drama at Britt's camp fire, he'd have to answer them truthfully. He'd already talked to Blaine, though. He knew everything else would be a piece of cake compared to that.

_Yeah. That sounds great._

* * *

><p>"You could've told me,"<p>

"I didn't want to tell anyone," Kurt admitted. "I felt so…dirty…"

"I'm not going to lie, though," Mercedes twirled her fork in her plate of spaghetti. "It does hurt a little that you didn't tell me sooner. I couldn't believe Rachel Berry knew and I didn't."

Kurt nodded, widening his eyes at an empty spot on the table and trying to hide his annoyance at the fact that Finn and Rachel had told everyone at the camp fire about the Sam situation the second people started speculating why Blaine had run out.

"Why didn't you tell me, Kurt? It's not like I would've been surprised,"

Kurt breathed deeply. "I didn't really have an opportunity," He said honestly. "And why do people keep acting like Sam and I were this inevitable thing? I mean, if it was so predictable, why did you date him?"

"Oh, I don't know," Mercedes chuckled. "It was one of those awkward situations where I knew before him but everyone else knew before me…"

"I didn't know anything…"

"Blaine had you forced into denial."

"It's kind of stupid!" Kurt took a frustrated sip of his soda. "People decided he was gay and all of a sudden you all thought we'd end up hooking up just because we're two gay guys who apparently can't control ourselves!"

"No! I never said I thought he was gay!" Mercedes corrected him immediately. "Actually no one thinks he's gay. We all just think he's gay for you!"

"You can't be gay for just one person, Mercedes…"

"Okay, so maybe he's bi." She rolled her eyes. "Either way, he has some sort of weird fascination with you. Artie was the one who noticed it first. He's always staring at you."

"Oh, shut up!" Kurt thought the idea was ridiculous. Yet, at the same time, he was strangely intrigued by the thought that Sam had thought about hooking up with him on some occasion before the party at Rachel's.

"It's true!" Mercedes asserted. "And he was always reminding me how witty you are, and telling the same stories about you over and over. And did you notice that whenever we'd all be in a group, you two would end up in your own conversation! You'd never actually _talk _about anything. You two just sort of flirt…"

"We do not!" Kurt felt himself blush. Maybe he didn't realize he was flirting. He'd gotten to feel so comfortable around Sam.

"It's okay," Mercedes reassured him. "I honestly believe Sam didn't realize he was doing it either. You were both repressing it, and then the alcohol let it all loose…"

That couldn't be it, though. Kurt was sure it wasn't. He was rebounding. Sam was experimenting. It was too simple. Everyone else was searching for complexities that weren't there.

"Is that why you guys broke up, then?" Kurt asked cynically. "…Because you were under the impression that Sam was harboring some sort of undiscovered feelings toward me?"

"That was part of it," Mercedes sighed. "Honestly, he just sort of ended it one day. He barely offered me an explanation. We said we'd still be friends but just sort of stopped talking, and now it's really awkward because we can't think of anything to say to each other."

"I'm sorry,"

"I'm not. I could really care less. There's this guy at work who I might go out with this weekend and he and I actually have things in common."

Kurt chuckled. "There's a plus."

"I just want you to know that I won't accuse you of breaking any rules if you decide to date my ex."

Kurt was shocked that she even thought he was considering that. "Thanks Mercedes, but I'm not going to date Sam."

"Okay. Not now, but maybe after you get over Blaine…"

"No," Kurt shook his head dismissively. "No, I'm going to get Blaine back."

Mercedes didn't look impressed. She blinked stupidly at him. "…Why…?"

Kurt realized that he couldn't think of a logical answer. He went with the reason he'd been telling himself over and over again. "I love him."

"Right…"

As Kurt finished his pasta, all he could think about was what Mercedes had said about Sam. There was no way Sam had some long-repressed crush on him. If he did, he wouldn't want to help him win back Blaine. No. That would be totally weird.


	6. Chapter 6

Blaine padded down the hallway. He didn't _want_ to answer the door but he was the only one home, and he knew that he couldn't get away with ignoring it because his car was in the driveway. Whoever it was could clearly see that someone was at home.

It was nearly 3 PM and he hadn't changed out of his pajamas. He hoped it was just a package or something, so he wouldn't have to explain to a caller that his heart had been broken and he no longer possessed the willpower to put an effort into his presentation.

He lazily pulled open the front door and froze. "…What the hell are you doing here?" He asked tonelessly, too depressed to even get reasonably angry.

"You can slam the door in my face. I'd completely understand. But I think you should hear me out first."

Blaine stepped out onto the stoop, closing the front door behind him. "I'm sure this will be entertaining enough." He said spitefully.

Sam shook his hair out of his eyes. "You hurt him." He began calmly. "I know you like to think of yourself as completely innocent, but you're not."

And suddenly; the anger hit. "Why the hell are you here, Evans? How can you be accusing me of anything right now when you're the one who messed around with my boyfriend?"

"That's it!" Sam snapped back at him. "He didn't think he was your boyfriend at the time!"

"We had a stupid little fight! And Kurt knew it was cheating, otherwise he wouldn't have waited to tell me about it."

"Dude, you can't obviously think that's the reason he didn't tell you," Sam said, almost mockingly.

Blaine crossed his arms and clenched his teeth. "You're a real tool, you know that?" He spat. "Showing up here…how did you even know where I lived?"

"Kurt and I dropped you off once,"  
>"You and Kurt didn't do anything! You dropped me off, and then you dropped Kurt off…"<p>

"Okay," Sam rolled his eyes. "Whatever dude."

"…Coming here to rub it in my face…" Blaine mumbled. "You really can just leave, okay?"

Blaine turned back to the door but Sam stopped him. "That's not why I'm here!" He asserted.

"Why are you then?" Blaine asked impatiently.

"You need to take him back." Sam shoved his hands in his pockets. "You don't want to just end it forever because of one misunderstanding. Kurt and I, we're just friends. We were drunk and we thought it would be fun to fool around, but that was it…it didn't mean anything…"

Blaine wanted to believe him. Sam could tell. He just stared sadly at Sam, trying as hard as he could.

Sam spoke again. "Look…dude…Kurt's a mess right now. He needs you."

Blaine took a deep breath, finally deciding not to be vulnerable. "He _needs_ to feel like the good guy," He corrected, his eyes narrowing spitefully. "And apparently, so do you…"

Sam's face contorted. "…What…?"

Blaine shook his head tiredly. "I'm sorry, but you're both out of luck."

He disappeared into his house, closing the door in Sam's face.

* * *

><p>Kurt hadn't updated his Facebook status at all that week. He hadn't had anything positive to say, and he'd never been a fan of advertising his woes over the internet. Negative statuses were tricky because you had to be vague as to not offend anyone, and it always put friends in the awkward position of trying to figure out what was wrong with you without overstepping or sounding insensitive.<p>

Blaine, however, did not have the same concerns as his ex-boyfriend.

The first status was the night of Rachel's party, right after the first blow-out. It said: _"Since when does 'I love you' mean 'IDGAF'. Damn it. I need ice cream." _

The next morning it was _"I am such an idiot. Wish me luck as I try to make this right!" _

That night it had been positive, but it was still too personal for Kurt's taste, seeing how it was clearly referring to the events in Kurt's bedroom. It said. _"Life is good. Spent an amazing evening with the best thing that has ever happened to me... I Love You Kurt Hummel"_ He was tagged. He hated it when Blaine tagged him.

And then, there was this weekend. Blaine had updated his status eight times since the bonfire. After coming home from lunch with Mercedes, Kurt realized this in horror.

Number one: _"I have never been this mad." _

Number two: _"asdrwgfdgtedhdhd Thanks for making it impossible to sleep…jackass." _

Number three: _"Yes, my relationship status is different. You can ask me about it, but I'll probably bite your head off." _

Number four: _"Yep. It's going to be a long night." _

Kurt thought maybe Blaine was hoping that Kurt was sitting there, refreshing his news feed and feeling sorry for him.

Around four AM: Number five: _"I think I'm actually going to sign off and lay down now. Wish me luck."_

Then, at ten: Number six: _"Tossed and turned but managed to get some shut eye. Woke up thinking everything was fine for a minute, and then I remembered. Great…" _

And then, it got interesting…

Number seven: _"Yeah. Send the adulterer over for a chat. That's a great idea, douche bag." _

Kurt's stomach sank. What…The…Fuck…

Number eight: _"Fact: Trouty Mouth is an ass wipe."_

Subtle, Blaine…

Kurt dialed Sam immediately, his eyes still glued to his newsfeed. "Well, if it isn't the ass wipe himself?"

"...excuse me?"

"You should see Blaine's Facebook statuses. He's posting about your little encounter. It sounds like it was…pleasant." Kurt refreshed to see if Blaine had said anything else.

"Wow…" Sam was a bit flustered. "Um…I was actually going to come talk to you about that."

"Mhmmm…" Kurt was clearly irritated. "Sam…what did you say to him?"

"Well, he didn't really let me say much…"

"Shocking…"

"I tried to get him to take you back!"

"Oh no…"

"I'm sorry, Kurt!" Sam said. "I wasn't thinking. I just thought that if he knew you and I weren't seriously considering getting together it might change things."

"Clearly, it didn't…" Kurt huffed.

"Clearly," Sam repeated. "Dude, I don't know how else you thought I could try to help you get him back. It's not like I'd be any help preparing some apologetic gesture out of a romantic comedy. Honestly, I think something like that would fail anyway. He's really mad, it would be too...cute."

"Duh, Sam," Kurt rolled his eyes. "I wasn't thinking about anything like that."

"Well, then, what were you thinking of doing differently?" Sam shot back at him. "I went with logic. It seemed like the only way I could do things."

"Damn it Sam…" Kurt mumbled, trailing off.

"Are you mad at me?" Sam asked sweetly.

"I don't know!" Kurt snapped, frustrated. "Look, I'll talk to you later. I'm going to try to fix this."

Two minutes later he had Blaine on the phone.

"Hello, cheater; cheat on your boyfriend with a douchey blond lately?"

"Okay. Yeah. You are officially five years old."

"That's awkward. You realize that means that you practiced pedophilia for five months…"

"You're ridiculous…"

"At least I'm not a cheater; cheater…"

"Oh sweet lord…I was wrong. You're not five. You're about two-and-a-half."

Blaine ignored this. "By the way, the saint-act that the fish-faced Aryan is putting on is a joke. I hope you realize that."

"Look, Blaine, I'm sorry," Kurt apologized genuinely. "Sam shouldn't have gone over there. I didn't know he was doing that. I certainly didn't ask him to."

"Whatever," Blaine huffed.

Kurt wanted to hang up. He was just about done. But he didn't know if Blaine would ever answer his phone again. "I saw your statuses…"

"Oh. Did I forget to block you?"

"I think you wanted me to see them, Blaine, seeing how they were all about me."

"Get over yourself, I was venting."

"I know," Kurt said calmly. "You were upset last night. We both were. I thought now that we've calmed down we could maybe meet up and discuss this like mature adults instead of making passive aggresive cracks at eachother over social networking sites."

There was a long silence. Then Blaine finally let his guard down and said weakly, "I don't trust you Kurt."

"I know." Kurt knew he had to own up.

"I haven't for a while. You basically proved all my insecurities right, do you realize that?"

"I would've never cheated on you, Blaine." Kurt promised him. "I wish you'd get that through your head."

"That doesn't make any sense, though, because you did cheat on me and it fucking sucked!"

"Blaine, I know you remember what you said to me that night," Kurt tried. "I know that even if you were to admit it, you'd still be mad at me...you're just afraid of seeming irrational." He waited for Blaine to say something, but the other end of the line was silent again. "I admit it, okay? I screwed up. I shouldn't have lied to you. Maybe I shouldn't have hooked up with Sam in the first place. But I promise you that it wouldn't have happened if you hadn't given me the impression that I was free to."

That was it. That was all Kurt needed to say. Knowing that Blaine was finally listening to him for real was like a huge weight lifted off his chest. Blaine asked, "Were you even upset, though? If you thought it was over…didn't you need time to process it?"

"At first I was a wreck," Kurt told him. "I was crying in Rachel's room for an hour. I guess I just sort of figured I'd have to get over it eventually."

"And it didn't even cross your mind that I might come around…" Blaine said bitterly.

Kurt felt horrible. He hated upsetting Blaine like this. "I really do love you." He offered.

"This is why it bothers me, Kurt," Blaine's voice was straining as he spoke. "You're right. By textbook definition you didn't cheat. But why were you so quick to accept that we were over? You didn't call me after I left your house after the fight you just let me have the worst night of my life while you celebrated your freedom…"

Kurt could tell that Blaine was starting to cry, and he choked up as well. "Blaine…I'm so sorry," He said for the countless time. "I was just trying not to think about it…"

"But don't you understand why it looks so bad?" Blaine asked desperately. "Don't you understand why I feel like you were just waiting for an opportunity when it wouldn't be considered cheating? You _knew _how I felt about you and Sam. He was the reason we were fighting in the first place! Remember? You told _him_ of all people that I was the 'old ball and chain'. I thought either you guys were just waiting for me to get out of the way or…or you were looking for a way to spite me."

"It wasn't like, that, Blaine," Kurt could tell that for the first time, Blaine believed him. "And we weren't _waiting_ for anything."

"Maybe _you_ weren't," Blaine sighed acceptingly. "But everyone sees the way he looks at you."

Kurt sighed in frustration. How come everyone had seemed to notice but him? "People imagine things sometimes…"

"No," Blaine sighed. "You look at him too. You guys have, like, all these inside jokes and you _do_ flirt with him. I actually thought it was just a bromance, but now that I know he's gay…"

"He's not gay,"

"Damn it, you're stupid…"

"Hey…!"

"Kurt!" Blaine almost laughed. "I honestly believe that you _think_ you love me, and as long as I want you you'll stick around because it's comfortable…"

"Blaine…" Kurt didn't want him to continue. He knew the basic gist of what was coming next.

"…I think you're afraid to admit to yourself that you'll do okay without me."

"I love you…" Kurt was barely audible.

"Just stop it!" Blaine shouted. Kurt was startled, and started crying harder. He wiped his wet cheeks on his sleeve. "How do you think I feel knowing that all I am is the guy that's distracting you from wanting anything else?"

Kurt struggled to catch his breath. "…I don't get it, Blaine…" He admitted timidly.

"You will," Blaine replied. "And you'll come back and thank me. We can be friends again…later. Okay?"

"…Yeah…" He tried to accept it. He really did.

"We'll both come out of this alive."

Kurt knew that this was the end of it. Blaine wasn't going to change his mind. He couldn't think of anything else to say. "Goodbye Blaine."

"I love you Kurt…"

And then there was the dial tone. Kurt lowered his phone from his ear. As the tears ran down his face he felt only one thing: peace.


	7. Chapter 7

The next time Kurt spoke to Sam was two weeks later.

"Hey. You still mad?" Sam mumbled casually over the phone. Kurt thought he might have food in his mouth.

"What are you eating?"

"Chips!" As if it was totally obvious. "Is that a yes?"

"What?" There was a loud crunch.

"Are you mad?" Sam asked urgently.

"Oh my god," Kurt said, frustrated. "No. I'm not mad. I think we've both had enough time to get over ourselves, Samuel."

"So, you and the major appliance never got back together…?"

"No, and thank you so much for calling to ask about it when it, like, actually mattered."

Sam matched his tone perfectly. "Thank you for calling to update me when it, like, actually mattered…"

Kurt sighed, thankful that Sam couldn't see the smile that was creeping over his face. "You're impossible,"

Sam ignored this. "So, I'm glad you're not mad at me anymore, wanna know why?"

"Why?"

"I need to go shopping." Sam said simply; almost rudely. "Are you up for a man date?"

"…For you…?" Kurt responded wryly. "Why not…I have nothing else to live for…"

As he hung up, Kurt remembered a similar phone call he'd had with Blaine, right after they started going out.

_"Hello…" Blaine said smoothly. "How is my angel this morning?" _

_"Oh god," Kurt giggled at the new term of endearment. "I'm fine, and yourself?" _

_"I'm just dandy. I need to go shopping; you wanna come with me and carry my bags?" _

_"If I go to the mall, there's not promising that I'll even be able to handle all of my own bags." _

_"So that's a yes?" _

_"For you, Blaine, it's always a yes." _

They had been a lot sweeter to each other than he and Sam ever were. Kurt kind of wished Blaine could see the way he and Sam talked to each other. Then he would know that they were clearly not in love.

* * *

><p><em>"Look at those guys!" Blaine grinned. He took Kurt's hand in his and inched closer to him. Kurt shivered, only because Blaine's touch was still unfamiliar and exciting. <em>

_"Aw, that's sweet," Kurt cooed back, watching a couple of toddlers ride past them on a miniature train track. "I loved trains when I was a kid." _

_"So did I…It must be encoded in the DNA of little boys." _

_"Even the gay ones," _

_They chuckled warmly, and in unison. Blaine held his arm tighter and led him into the nearby Gap. They'd driven out of their way to this mall because Blaine still refused to set foot in the one Jeremiah worked at. _

_"Okay…" Kurt said as they walked into the store, sizing up the racks. "What are we looking for?" _

_"I need new jeans," Blaine told his boyfriend excitedly. "…Maybe some polo-shirts and cardigans…" _

_"You keep it simple," Kurt had known that. "I can respect that."_

_"A guy can only wish for the ability to pull off the things you do." _

_Kurt blushed, taking it as a compliment. _

_Once Blaine had taken an armload into the dressing rooms, Kurt waited patiently for him. He wasn't shopping for himself because his dad had told him before he left the house that morning that if he came home with any more clothes, he was going to set a fire in the back yard and burn Kurt's existing wardrobe piece by piece. Burt Hummel, for some reason, believed that there was such a thing as owning too many clothes. _

_Blaine came out wearing an outfit he'd pieced together. "What do you think?" _

_It looked just like every other article of clothing Blaine owned, but Blaine looked good in everything. "Fantastic. The cuts really suite you…" _

_"You think!" Blaine grinned. _

_"Definitely... Buy it all." _

_"Okay then!" _

_Kurt crossed his arms and stood back to wait for the next selection. He knew he'd have more fun shopping with the girls; people who actually enjoyed all of the variety that fashion had to offer, but he was thrilled to be at the mall with Blaine, giving him all of his support and approval. He'd always wanted to go shopping with a boyfriend. There was just something…special…about approving your significant other's fashion decisions. _

_Blaine picked everything he wanted out and rang it up on his mother's credit card. Kurt helped him carry his bags to the car. _

_"You're amazing," Blaine told him as they tossed them into the back seat. "Do you realize that? You're just…an amazing boyfriend." _

_Kurt grinned. "You're quite the boyfriend yourself," _

_They closed the back door and kissed for several minutes; right there in the parking lot for the world to see…_

Kurt thought about that trip with Blaine as he got in his car to pick up Sam. He remembered how good he'd felt. He didn't think he could ever feel that way again; not with anyone other than Blaine.

For the entirety of the last two weeks, Kurt had been thinking about Blaine almost constantly. He'd been thinking about how Blaine had doubted that Kurt genuinely wanted to be with him. Kurt was confused as he thought about it over and over, trying to figure out if it was true. He knew that either way, nothing would change. It was just so important to him to be sure that Blaine was wrong. He never wanted anybody to know him better than he knew himself.

* * *

><p>"You know, my mom wanted to come…but shopping with my mom is even harder than shopping with you, believe it or not," Sam joked as they walked into Sears.<p>

"That's definitely surprising," Kurt said, glancing around the men's section. This was never a store that he'd come into on his own, but it was somewhere Sam could afford so Kurt didn't comment on it. "What are we looking for today?"

"My mom just told me to get some new stuff for when school starts: jeans and crap."

"Ah…" Kurt nodded.

"Now, I know you're going to try to put me in some ridiculous outfit with all the colors of the rainbow or something, so I'm telling you now to save it. I don't need you to get all…creative on me."

Kurt's jaw dropped in offense. "Why did you even ask me to come?" He asked incredulously.

Sam grinned and patted him on the shoulder. "I wanted the company. And I do want opinions…but really, all you have to say is yes or no…"

Kurt sighed heavily. "You might as well cut off my tongue."

"Dude, that's sick," Sam cringed. Kurt shrugged.

Sam went over to a stack of graphic T-shirts and began examining them.

"Don't you want something a little more…classy…?" Kurt asked sheepishly, following his friend. "You'd look great in, like, a sheer button-down with the sleeves rolled up."

"…Thinking about what I'd look great in?" Sam wiggled his eyebrows teasingly.

"Oh my god," Kurt rolled his eyes.

"By the way," Sam licked his lips. "I like your outfit today!"

"…Really?" Kurt was dressed simply, because he couldn't wear too many layers because of the heat. He was in a blue polo and khaki shorts. He didn't think it was anything special.

"Yep…" Sam nodded. "I think it would look better on my bedroom floor."

Kurt pursed his lips disapprovingly. "You're a pig," He turned his back to his friend and strolled through the racks.

Sam caught up to him and grabbed him around the middle, pinning his arms to his sides. Kurt jumped at the unexpected contact, but he didn't fight Sam off because he knew the other boy was stronger then him. He laughed as Sam steered him around a corner, parking him next to a display of baseball caps. Sam picked one up and put it on Kurt's head, then put one on his own head.

"Yeah: we should totally spend all our money on hats."

Stop it. Kurt removed both the hats and put them both on the shelf. Sam picked both of them back up and added several more to the stack. "Nope…I want them…"

"Stop it!" Kurt tried to take them back but Sam was holding onto them too tightly, and was moving around so Kurt couldn't get at them. The boys jumped around each other for a few minutes, until Sam lost his balance and bumped into the shelf, knocking a bunch of the other caps down to the floor.

"Aw…look at that." The boys both scrambled to pick them up, laughing shamefully.

Once they were on their feet again, and all the hats were replaced to their original location, Kurt sighed and said, "You need to buy clothes for real. I'm not joking."

"Okay!" Sam held his hands up, surrendering, and walking away from the shelves of hats. "Fine…I can do that."

"Good!" Kurt said.

"Good!" Sam barked back.

Kurt realized he couldn't stop smiling.

* * *

><p>They grabbed lunch at this organic deli later; a place Sam had recommended.<p>

"This meat…" Sam's eyes sparkled as he picked up his sandwich. "It's like…actual meat!"

"As opposed to all those meat substitutes that are circulating throughout the food industry…"

"No!" Sam shook his head. "It's like, fresh. You can actually taste the flavor!" Sam took a large bite, moaning as he chewed. Kurt couldn't help notice how sexual it sounded. He took a bite of his own Roast Beef and realized Sam was right.

"My god…!" Kurt wiped a spot of mustard off the corner of his mouth. "What the hell!"

"I KNOW!" Sam mumbled. "Here, try the chicken!" He thrust a handful of sandwich in Kurt's face. Kurt giggled uncomfortably, but followed Sam's instructions. His bottom lip grazed the tip of Sam's thumb as he took a bite. He was glad he hadn't bit him. The chicken was just as good as the beef.

"You can take the meat home by the quarter-pound!" Sam said excitedly. "You should bring some home for your dad. It's really good for you and I know you and Carol have him eating healthy."

Kurt grinned, just because he was surprised that Sam remembered anything about his family. "Maybe I will…" He said quietly.

Sam's eyebrows scrunched up. "Why are you looking at me like that?" He asked, still smiling slightly.

Kurt realized that he might've looked a little strange. He could never cover up his emotions very well, so the thrill he felt when Sam remembered things about him was no secret. "Nothing…" Kurt shook his head and stared down at his food. "It's just…nice…"

"What is…?"

Kurt hesitated, and then shrugged. "The deli…I don't know…"

"Yeah," Sam nodded skeptically. "It's really nice…"

They didn't talk much more as they finished eating, but it wasn't uncomfortable. Kurt realized that they were good enough friends now that they didn't feel the need to make small talk.

"Thanks for today," Sam told Kurt as he drove him home. "I haven't been out of the house much lately."

"Oh…and why's that?"

"I haven't really had a reason to."

"Yeah, I know what you mean…" Kurt said truthfully.

"It's nice to be in the presence of someone who's not six…or forty…" Sam went on.

"Or Finn…" Kurt joked.

There was a long pause, and Sam said, "I really missed you these past few weeks…"

"Yeah…?"

"Yeah…" Kurt could feel Sam looking at him, even though he couldn't look back because he had to keep his eyes on the road.

"How've you been?" Kurt asked nervously. He'd been waiting for the right opportunity to ask about Sam's experiment. "How's…you know…what I was helping you with going?"

The next pause wasn't much longer than the previous, but it felt longer because Kurt was anxious to hear his response. No particular reason. He was just really curious. Sam sighed. "I realized it doesn't really matter. I'm just gunna roll with things."

"Oh…" Kurt didn't really get it.

"I just don't see why we have to put labels on everything…" He told Kurt uneasily. "That's what sucks, you know? Everyone just assumes you're straight unless you tell them you're gay and if you're gay it becomes, like, _who _you are…And if you're neither people call you gay anyway because they just want a name to call you…it's just…labels. They mean way more to everyone else than to the people who are given them…"

Kurt took a moment to process that. "I've never really thought about it like that."

"Of course you haven't," There was a hint of resentment in Sam's voice that confused him. "You actually have a label that makes sense to you…why would you over think it?"

Kurt wanted to see Sam's face. He fought the urge to pull over just so he could read it. "That's…something…Sam."

"A great big 'fuck you' to society, right?" Sam almost teased.

Kurt grinned. He liked the sound of that. "Totally," Sam had such an interesting outlook. It was refereshing.

Kurt pulled into the parking lot of Sam's apartment complex. "I'm glad you've figured things out, Sam." He said genuinely, on an end note. "I'm sorry I wasn't much help."

Sam shook his head. "No, you had your own problems to worry about. I couldn't ask you to help with mine on top of, you know, causing yours."

Kurt still didn't get why Sam had been such a good sport through all of this. "You're so amazing Sam." The words slipped breathlessly from his lips. He sounded like a crazed fan-girl, but he wasn't ashamed of it.

Sam's face softened. "Thank you, Kurt. I'm glad you think so."

And then they just sort of stared at each other. Sam realized they were having a moment before Kurt did and quickly put an end to it. "Thanks again for today, Kurt," He said quickly, climbing out of the car. "Text me, okay?"

Kurt took a deep breath, nodding. "Yeah…"

Sam closed the door and Kurt watched him disappear into his building. He felt a ping of emptiness and realized that he missed Sam already.

It had been a great day. He thought back to the day he and Blaine had gone to the mall, and he'd felt so satisfied with his life. At the time, he thought that was the best he'd ever feel. But today, something changed. With Sam, it went way beyond satisfaction. The feeling was a lot more personal with Sam.

Suddenly, Kurt's heart sank. The realization that Blaine had been right all along hit him like a ton of bricks.


	8. Chapter 8

Kurt sat on the couch with his hands folded in his lap. He was afraid to move; afraid of letting his elbow graze Sam's.

The room was dark. Sam always liked to turn the lights off when he watched movies because he wanted the "full effect". It didn't bother Kurt when they hung out in groups, but this was the first time they'd watched anything alone, and the dim lighting made Kurt nervous.

They were watching _Ghostbusters_, and the stay-puffed-marshmallow-man was attacking the city. Sam was clearly enjoying the scene, and kept glancing over at Kurt, watching for his reaction. Kurt didn't know why he'd asked Sam over in the first place. He'd wanted to see him, but he didn't think it would be so hard to contain himself.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, of course I am. Why do you ask?" Kurt's voice was higher than usual.

"Because I have never seen anyone look so uncomfortable in their own home."

Kurt shook his head. "I'm fine. I just…I was helping Dad and Finn move some…um…furniture and my entire body sore," He thought it was a pretty good lie. It wasn't even a complete lie, because he had helped his Dad rearrange the den earlier that day.

"Oh yeah…?" Sam reached up and started massaging Kurt's neck with a single hand. "What's sore? Does this help?"

Kurt swallowed. He couldn't do this. Ever since their shopping trip, he'd been trying to repress his attraction to Sam. He wanted so badly for his feelings to just go away. He was too stubborn to allow all his friends the ability to boast about how they saw "it" coming. Besides, he didn't even know if Sam felt the same way. One drunken hookup didn't mean anything…or did it.

"No, I'm fine," Kurt scooted away from Sam's touch.

"Why are you so jumpy?" Sam asked softly, comfortingly. It almost sounded seductive to Kurt.

"I'm not…" Kurt tried.

"Kurt…" Sam knew he was bullshitting.

Kurt turned to make eye contact with Sam for the first time since sitting down. His eyes pleaded for Sam not to ask anymore questions. There was an odd tension between them, and Kurt searched his brain for something to say to Sam to relieve it. Unfortunately, though, he was distracted by the closeness of Sam's plump lips…the nervous way Sam was breathing…the outline of his shoulder-muscles that were clearly visible through his T-shirt.

And then Sam leaned closer to him, and he gave up. They kissed gently and unsurely at first, and then once they were sure that they both wanted it; that they were both feeling the heat of it, they upped the intensity.

Soon, they were lying vertically on Kurt's couch, Kurt on top of Sam, their chests pressed together so that neither of them could distinguish who's heartbeat was who's.

Then Sam stopped kissing, and Kurt had a moment of Panic.

Sam took a deep breath. "I love you."

"What…!" Kurt rolled off Sam. As he tumbled to the floor, hitting his arm on the coffee table, he realized he probably could've been a bit more graceful.

Sam sat up. "Shit…"

"I'm sorry…" Kurt jumped to his feet. "…What…?"

"I freaked you out…" Sam stammered. "I didn't mean it…"

"Oh…" Kurt felt stupid.

"I mean…of course I meant it…" Sam seemed to be almost talking to himself. "I mean…it just sort of slipped out."

"Oh…" Kurt knew he needed to say something, anything. And then, he heard himself say, "I don't know what to say,"

"Look…I think you're hot…" Sam explained. "But I don't want what you and I have to just be physical."

"Oh…?"

"Not to say we have to, like, _have_ anything…" Sam continued. "I mean…I know I'm not a knight in shining armor like Blaine. I'm not going to serenade you in public, and I probably will never look good in a blazer, but I've been crazy about you since before I even knew it. That night at Rachel's was poorly timed, I know, but ever since then all I can do is think about you. I love being around you, dude. I have fun, even when we're disagreeing because I never know what you're going to say. I don't like to not be around you. And I didn't want to be _that _guy while you were with Blaine, but you're not anymore and I can't sit here letting anything else hold me back…At this point in time, I can't imagine being happy with anyone else."

And then Kurt kissed him again. Kurt hadn't been able to help himself. At this point, he was just following his impulses.

"Is that a yes?" Sam asked.

"Did you ask a question?" Kurt chuckled. He kissed him again.

"No…" Sam chuckled too. "I guess I forgot to actually ask it…"

"So…" He could barely get the words out, because Sam's lips were keeping him from actually speaking. "So…what then…?"

"I don't know."

They kept making out, making an unspoken agreement to just talk about it later.

Suddenly, the lights flicked on.

"Oh shit!" Finn exclaimed. Sam and Kurt flew apart.

"Sorry, man…" Sam mumbled sheepishly.

"Oh god…" Finn groaned. "Can you guys, like, not tell Artie about this? I bet him twenty more dollars that you guys wouldn't make out again and I really don't have that kind of money."

"Get out." Kurt ordered tonelessly.

* * *

><p>Kurt knew he should just let himself be happy. Sam was great. But as he<p>

sat at his computer several days later, staring at the "edit info" page of his profile, he struggled to change his relationship status, even though Sam had done it hours earlier.

He knew what was stopping him. It was Blaine. He knew how often the boy went on Facebook. For some reason, thinking about Blaine seeing this on his news-feed made him feel horrible.

So, Kurt closed the window and grabbed his car keys. This was something he had to do in person.

"Hi," Blaine said, civilly letting his ex into his house. Kurt had texted Blaine before he left so that he wouldn't just be showing up unannounced.

"Thank you, Blaine," Kurt said sweetly. "It's really nice of you to let me come over."

"No problem," Blaine led Kurt down the hall and into the living room. "What did you want to talk about?"

Blaine sat on the couch. Kurt took a seat in the chair across from him. "I was thinking on my way over here…" Kurt began. "About when I first transferred to Dalton…"

"It seems like forever ago," Blaine nodded sadly.

"You were, like, my only friend there. And, you know I had a crush on you since practically the day I met you, but I never said anything because your friendship was so important to me…"

"I think that's why I never admitted to myself that I knew you had a crush on me," Blaine sighed.

"We got along so well…" Kurt reminded him. "I miss that."

"Me too…" Blaine said. There was a look of longing in his eyes. Kurt realized that he might sound like he wanted Blaine back. He panicked and cut to the chase.

"Sam and I are together now…"

Blaine took a moment to process it. Kurt saw the initial disappointment pass over him, and then the acceptance. Blaine smiled weakly and said, "I told you so."

"I didn't want you to find out from Facebook," Kurt explained quickly. "I respect you too much for that."

Blaine needed to process that too. "You know, I know that's the truth, Kurt…I mean. I get it. You're really not just here to rub it in my face."

"Thank you…" Kurt really meant it. "You know, what I was saying about when I came to Dalton…we were friends, Blaine. When we were dating, we couldn't be friends anymore we were always trying so hard to be perfect for each other…but I think we could go back."

Blaine was doubtful. "Could we?"

"You meant a lot to me for a long time, Blaine. You still do. I would hate myself forever if I thought the pain I caused you was irreparable."

Blaine hesitated, and then said. "What's funny is that you were the one who always thought we should be together…"

"I know…"

Then there was a long silence. "I'm going to get over you. I'm sure."

"Me too…" Kurt told him.

Blaine bit his lip thoughtfully. "Friends…" He said to himself.

"I swear it'll be easier than it sounds."

"Okay." Blaine agreed. "I guess it's worth a try."

* * *

><p>When Kurt got home, he passed Finn in the kitchen.<p>

"Hey man," Finn said, standing at the island and eating a cup of yogurt. "There's something waiting for you in your room."

Kurt grinned, instantly knowing what it was. He rushed upstairs.

"Hey gorgeous," Sam was sitting on his bed, on top of the covers, leaning up against the headboard.

Kurt jumped at him and gave him a long kiss. When they pulled apart, Kurt let out a dreamy sigh. "I love you too." He said.

"Well…" Sam kept his arms around him, holding him close. "…That was a delayed response…"

Kurt grinned. "I needed time to work everything out…"

"Mhmmm…" It was clear that Sam didn't care. He just leaned in and kissed his new boyfriend again.

They continued kissing; doing nothing more; for the next hour, both of them thrilled that there was nothing left to stop them.


End file.
